Redeeming Everything

Tonight was a night of worship for my church as the worship team is preparing to record their first live album next month. All of the songs are original writings and arrangements, but I have heard most of them several times now. Some more than others. One of the songs tonight has three words that stood out to me and has stuck with me for the last couple hours. I have heard this line and sung this line many times over the last few weeks, but tonight was different. I love when God speaks to me that way! He often uses a familiar song or a familiar passage of scripture to speak to me in a way I've never heard the words before. 

The line I heard tonight simply said "You redeemed everything."  To make this really basic in explanation, I looked up the definition of redeem. To put it simply, redeemed means "to buy or pay off; clear by payment." I will not insult your intelligence by defining "everything." In the context of saying Jesus redeemed everything, it means He paid off everything for me. Seriously stop and think about that for a minute. That sin you have been working to overcome? He already paid it. The striving to be a better person so you can be "worthy" enough? He already covered that too. 

Another way of defining redeem is "to recover by payment or other satisfaction." Jesus redeemed us by making the payment for us through His sacrifice. So that we do not have to endure hell for eternity, He was willing to go there for us instead. For three days He battled satan. And He won. That battle you are fighting? He's already won it. That healing you are praying for? He's already healed it. He did it all in order to recover a relationship with YOU!

More personally, when I think of all God has redeemed in my life, I tend to focus on the major highlights (or sometimes low lights). Yet, it is not only the big things He has redeemed. Yes, He has brought an amazing healing and restoration to my relationship with my dad. Yes, He has been my faithful provision for over a year now (longer really, but my trust has been there fully for this last year). Yes, He is constantly transforming me more and more into the woman He originally created me to be. But even more so, He has redeemed me in the little things. He has truly redeemed everything. Yes...every thing. All the things I do not even remember doing that should have required some SERIOUS payment. He redeemed it.

He already redeemed it for you too. Are you willing to let Him?

Crushing Flowers

One morning last week I walked Olivia to school. In order to get to her school we have to walk through an empty field. Although there is no sidewalk, there is a worn path from people walking this same route. We were walking slightly off the path and on the grass. Scattered in the grass were little yellow flowers, or weeds. Olivia looks down and quickly jumps from the grass back onto the path. As she is doing so, she explains we are crushing the flowers! I questioned her on the accuracy of calling them flowers and she proceeded to tell me how beautiful they were and if we stepped on them they would die. 

For the last week I have been thinking about this conversation. Perhaps this is an example of why Christ said we should all become like little children. How many things do we view in life as "weeds." Yet, there is innate beauty within them. Perhaps we don't even realize we treat flowers as though they were weeds. I witnessed an example of this just one day after my conversation with Olivia.

My neighbor is a single dad of two. His children are a girl, about 14, and a boy, about 10. They were exiting their home on the way to school at the same time I was walking Olivia to her bus stop. On this morning, things at their house were apparently not going well. From what I could overhear, the argument of the moment was which child was going to ride in the front seat of the car. Most parents of more than one child has been a part of this battle. However, the father was not entertained with their behavior. The father screamed at the children informing them he was not in the mood for "this crap." (I'm quoting, yet editing his exact wording). I then heard him yell to the daughter "You just shut up! You don't have an opinion in this! You don't have a voice!"

Upon hearing this, I immediately flashed back to my 15 year old self and the verbal abuse I experienced from my mom's boyfriend. This dad was making the same type of crushing statements I heard throughout my teenage years. My instinct was to immediately insert myself into the conversation. My only thought at the moment was "what kind of an example of a man are you being to your daughter?" When she gets older and a man is abusing her, will you be surprised? How will she ever demand to be respected as the beautiful flower she is if her daddy treats her like a weed?

Thankfully my adult self met the Daddy who created me. I'm learning to listen to His words instead of the recording I heard as a teenager. I'm learning I'm not a weed. I'm more like the flower that has just come through a storm. While my stem may be bent and I look beaten up a little, I become a beautiful flower with her head held high again when in the presence of the Son.

I Thought It Would Be Easier

For some unknown reason, I thought today would be easier. This morning I released my five year old daughter into the great unknown....also referred to as public school. I know it is something millions of parents have done before and there are thousands others doing it just this week. However, this is different. She is my baby. She is the little person I've had the honor of sharing every day with for the last year since I have been working from home. I'm going to miss hearing "hey mom, guess what....I love you" said at random moments throughout the day. 

Until two weeks ago I was planning to home school her for Kindergarten. The information came for her teacher assignment and I was assured by several friends who knew the teacher that she is a wonderful, grandmotherly type of teacher. I met her and liked what I saw so I decided to give this school another chance. You see, my experience with this school in the past has not been a good one. My older daughter attended the same school and experienced horrific bullying and an overall lack of any type of real education. Her fifth grade year was lost. When we moved her to a private school she had to repeat fifth grade in order to make up the lost year. Needless to say, my trust in this school is not very high. And now, to release my baby into their "care" is scary. 

I know Olivia is strong. She is so excited to be going to school. I asked how many new friends she will make and she quickly replied "100!" And she might be right. Olivia loves people. When our neighbor comes home from work, Olivia runs out the door to tell her hello. If she sees a family member of someone she knows, she always says "tell ______ I said hi."  Even if that someone is their pet.

My prayer is that her spirit would not become hardened by the world. Today feels like a loss of innocence for her. At the bus stop this morning a little boy used the "F" word and was talking about another inappropriate subject. I asked him to please be careful in what he is saying around younger children. Not to mention the boy himself was too young to be saying such things. I know I have raised her with values and compassion. I pray she is strong enough to be a good influence on the other children instead of the of the other way around.

The hardest part of today is realizing she is growing up. There is no way to stop the process of time. Because of having an older child, I know within the blink of an eye she will no longer be in Kindergarten, but middle school. It seems like only a few weeks ago I was dropping her big sister off on her first day.

As I was walking with Olivia to the bus stop this morning she noticed some dirt on the side of the road and commented it looked like a horse. I guess now during the day I will have to take more time to look at the shapes of the clouds or even dirt on the ground and become more child-like myself. 

As I was helping her get ready this morning she was carrying around her blankie. The last thing she did before leaving was brush her teeth. As she walked out of the bathroom, she left blankie laying on the floor. It somehow felt symbolic to me. She was ready to leave behind her security and excited for what lay ahead of her. We should all view life the same way.

Psalms 78

Today I am reading Psalm 78. This is quite a long chapter and I recommend you read the entire chapter for yourself (http://www.youversion.com/bible/nkjv/ps/78/1). ; What I would like to focus on today is the beginning of the chapter.

"I'm chewing on the morsel of a proverb; I'll let you in on the sweet old truths, Stories we heard from our fathers, counsel we learned at our mother's knee. We're not keeping this to ourselves, we're passing it along to the next generation-God's fame and fortune, the marvelous things he has done. He planted a witness in Jacob, set his Word firmly in Israel, Then commanded our parents to teach it to their children So the next generation would know, and all the generations to come-Know the truth and tell the stories can trust in God, Never forget the works of God but keep his commands to the letter. Heaven forbid they should be like their parents, bullheaded and bad, A fickle and faithless bunch who never stayed true to God." Psalm 78:2-8 MSG

I love how the Message translation shares this verse. The "sweet old truths" that were shared by their parents. If you have a relationship with Christ and you have children, it is your responsibility to share your faith and the truth of Christ with them. This is true whether your children are two or thirty-two. We are the first and most influential witnesses in our children's lives. I grew up going to church, yet my parents never shared their PERSONAL faith with me. We never read the bible together or talked about what we had heard in church. Perhaps because of this lack of sharing, I did make many of the same mistakes my parents had made in their pasts. What I learned was that church was a place you went on Sunday, but was basically irrelevant the rest of the week. Before my mom passed away, I know her walk with Christ became very personal to her. I've seen changes in my dad over the last several years so I know His walk is different now too. In fact almost every time we talk now, there is mention of God and Christ. At my step-mother's funeral a couple weeks ago, I saw my dad raising his hands in worship. This is something I never recall him doing when I was younger.

Do you talk to you children about God in a personal, first hand kind of way. If they are older, do they know of your trust in Him. If He has provided for you, have you shared this with your children? Do you pray with your children? Do you ask them to pray for others? As I'm typing this, my 5 year old just walked into the room with the money she received from the tooth fairy last night and showed me the part she was putting aside for her offering. The rest she wants to use to purchase a birthday present for someone she knows (all $.75). My heart sings at her generosity! Are the fruits of the spirit being displayed in your children? Are they displayed by you?

My prayer for you going into this weekend is that your family's walk with Christ would become stronger. Try praying with your children and reading scripture together. Ask them for their input on what has been read. You might be surprised at just how much they understand! You might want to avoid Song of Solomon unless they are at least 16. :)

Psalm 69

Today we are reading Psalm 69. There are quite a few verses in this chapter and most are the Psalmist crying out to God for help. Maybe it's just me, but the Psalms seem to be a lot of whining and complaining. Perhaps it is just the ones that fall on Wednesdays and Fridays when I am writing. I read the chapter and think, "didn't I already read this?" As I had this thought, I had to laugh at myself. I wonder if that is what God thinks when I am whining to Him, yet again, about the same issue. Just as the Psalmist is repeatedly pleading for mercy from His enemies and for God to have His vengeance, we can also become stuck in a routine of our requests to God.

The part of this chapter that really struck a chord with me today is found in verses 5-6:

"O God, You know my foolishness; And my sins are not hidden from You.

Let not those who wait for You, O Lord God of hosts, be ashamed because of me; Let not those who seek You be confounded because of me, O God of Israel"

How many of our actions are foolishness to God? Not only do we do foolish things, but then we try to hide them from God! While we may be able to hide things from our fellow brothers and sisters, there is absolutely nothing hidden from God. The message last Sunday at my church was on wisdom regarding immorality. When I think of "secret" sins, sex tops the list of those that come to mind. Not simply the act of sex, but everything that goes along with it....lustful thoughts, conversations, and pornography to name a few. I mention this because for me, this is MY area of "secret" sin. This is the area in which I have struggled the most. However, by my sharing this with you, I find it becomes no longer secret. It is also the area in which when I find myself struggling or being tempted, I have friends I can confide in and who encourage me to remain true to God. They reassure me of the promises He has made regarding the man of God He has chosen for me!

Throughout my years of walking with Christ, there are times I have stumbled. When these things happen, the second part of the above verse speaks to me. I pray that anyone who is seeking HIM, never be confounded because of me. See, as humans we can often place too much trust and faith in people. We are commanded to follow Christ, never His followers. When we place too much blind faith in another human being, we set ourselves up for disappointment. There have been times I have confessed to a fellow sister in Christ and seen her surprise at my confession (I'm not referring to just sexual sin here, but any area of battle). One friend even said "wow, I always thought you were stronger than that." While I appreciate her admiration of me, those types of thoughts toward any human are misplaced.



We can all find ourselves subject to weakness. This is why it is SO important to choose our friends wisely. This is why it is so important to remain plugged into your local church community. This is why it is important to read the word of God. Maybe it's just me, but I find it very difficult to read scripture and then deliberately choose to do something sinful. It is because as we are reading scripture for ourselves, this is when we are communing with the Holy Spirit. We are inviting Him into our lives and it is then we can hear His voice more clearly.  



My prayer for you today is that if there is anything you are keeping in secret, that it would be revealed. Find someone you can confide in and share your struggles. Please choose wisely in your confidants! We all need someone in our lives who will speak the truth of God to us in love and not judgment. I also recommend finding someone who is more mature in their spiritual walk and perhaps has walked the road you are on or one that is similar. They will understand where you are and can also provide the assurance that it all will work out and choosing God's path is always worth it!

Psalm 67

Psalms 67 is a chapter all about praise. There are times in life when praising God seems to be the very last thing we would want to do.

Family has turned their backs on us.

Your children have lost their minds and manners.

A close friend betray us.

The finances are non-existent and the bills keep coming.

We just lost a job.


The list of reasons we could choose to not praise God would take hours for me to list. However, there is the other side of the tale....



We woke up this morning. Not only did we wake up, but most of us woke up in a comfortable bed with shelter over our heads.

Our children cleaned their rooms without us asking and spent several hours playing together rather than fighting.

A card just arrived in the mail from a friend who knew you needed something to make you smile and a reminder that you are loved.

Family relationships which were once strained and now healing.

The sun is shining providing us with vitamin D...for free.

If you are reading these words, you have sight to see. You also have internet!

Even though funds are low or gone, you look around and see you have absolutely everything you need.

You lost your job, but now have more time to spend with your children and build friendships you never had time for before.


Perhaps you read the above list and think, "yeah, those all sound great, but......you don't know ___________ that is going on in my life."  Well, I have one more reason for you to offer praise:

Jesus came to earth, died in your place, so you can conversate and spend ETERNITY with the one and only God! Hello! The maker of the universe sent His SON for YOU!

No matter what is happening in your here and now, there is always a reason to sing praises! Nothing on earth compares to the love poured out by Christ at Calvary. No bill, no death, no argument, no hardship, no NOTHING!

"Let the peoples praise You, O God; Let all the peoples praise You.
Oh, let the nations be glad and sing for joy! For You shall judge the people righteously,
And govern the nations on earth. Selah
Let the peoples praise You, O God; Let all the peoples praise You." Psalm 67:3-5

Forgiving

Just as I was about to sit down to write on Psalm 60 yesterday, I received a phone call from my dad letting me know my stepmother passed away. May 20 of this year she was diagnosed with stage 4 liver cancer. That's only two months and 9 days. 70 days from diagnosis to going home to Jesus. In my conversations with Ruth after her diagnosis she never once complained. Not one time did she say anything negative. Her only concern was for my dad and how he would handle all of this after she was gone.

I am at a place of extreme mixed emotions right now. My relationship with my dad and stepmother was non-existent for about six years. Offense built on offense until it reached the place of not speaking. During this time of non-communication my youngest daughter Olivia was born. It was very hard to have a child and not have the support of either of my parents (my mom passed away in 1999). There were things that happened in my childhood on the part of my dad that led to the initial offense. The timing in my life when Ruth entered was not ideal and definitely not in receptive circumstances. Over the years many hurtful words were spoken from both sides. Racism played a huge role in our not communicating. For those who do not know, both my daughters are bi-racial.

What reopened the lines of communication was the death of my grandmother, my dad's mom. We were both at her funeral and it was the first time in years we were in the same place at the same time and had no option but to speak. The initial conversation was rough to say the least. I will not go into details, but only say I was literally backed into a corner and confronted regarding a conversation that had occurred several years prior. It was my stepmother who intervened and apologized to me and said she had told my dad to let it go. It was time to get over the past and move forward towards healing. After this meeting, I saw them a couple times as they were passing through the Charlotte area and we talked frequently on the phone.

It is a strange place to be right now. I'll be honest in saying I have no idea what the future holds in regards to my relationship with my dad. I am still in the process of healing from childhood wounds. Wounds he never remembers making and swears he never did. In my heart, I feel he is telling the truth by saying he doesn't remember ever doing the things he has been accused of doing. Not the truth in that he never did them, but the truth in that he does not remember. Somehow, this offers me the grace to forgive. As I've prayed for God to show me him and my stepmother as He sees them, I've come to view them with my eyes now at 34 and not my eyes at age 4, 14, or 24.

My prayer for each of you today is in regards to any relationship you have that needs to be reconciled. I've heard it said best that unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. When you refuse to forgive, you only hurt yourself. This is not to say that what happened to you is okay. Hurt is hurt no matter if it was intentional or unintentional, mental, physical, sexual, or emotional. Yet being a victim in you past does not have to make you a victim in your present or your future. The choice to forgive and move forward is completely up to you. I am also not promising it will be an instant occurrence. The enemy will fight to keep you within the prison of your offense and unforgiveness. He knows that as long as you are trapped there, you will be ineffective to God's kingdom. He knows the scriptures say:

"But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6:15

"And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” Mark 11:25

" “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37

These are just a few examples of scripture that tells us the number one reason why we have to forgive others. We cannot be forgiven if we are unwilling to extend forgiveness and grace to others. It's just that simple. None of us are guaranteed a tomorrow. If the person you are angry with died today, would there be words left unspoken that could have brought healing? If you died today, what would you want people to remember about you? Would it be that you were forgiving or that you refused to practice the grace you claimed to have through Christ?