Today I heard the song Because He Lives. It's one I haven't heard in a while. Hearing it took me back to childhood and the many Sundays spent in a Southern Baptist Church. The lyrics are:
Because He lives, I can face tomorrow
Because He lives, all fear is gone
Because I know He holds the future
And life is worth the living, just because He lives
Because He lives, all fear is gone
Because I know He holds the future
And life is worth the living, just because He lives
As I sang along with the lyrics I've sung hundreds of time, I heard them in a new way. What stood out the most was, "LIFE IS WORTH THE LIVING JUST BECAUSE HE LIVES."
So many people I know are fighting depression and suicidal thoughts. You can't hear a medicine commercial without hearing about possible side effects including suicidal thoughts. Things people take to help with depression may cause suicidal thoughts. Teenagers are attempting and committing suicide at astonishing numbers. Children still in ELEMENTARY school are killing themselves. What used to be a "grown up problem" is now an everyone problem. What leads someone to this place of wanting such a permanent way out of life? No hope.
I was once there. I attempted suicide when I was 17. I counted out 100 pills from various bottles in the medicine cabinet at my home. I took all of them. Within about an hour I started feeling very ill. My mom wasn't home at the time I took the pills. Intense vomiting had started before she got home. I didn't tell her what I had done so she assumed I had a virus. For the next 24 hours I continued vomiting. I don't remember ever having second thoughts about taking so many pills in order to kill myself. I only remember regretting it because I was so sick. Once they all worked their way out of my system, I was fine. At least physically.
Why did I do that? I had no hope. I had no relationship with the only person who gives REAL hope. I attended church. That didn't mean I knew Jesus. All I saw was the situation around me. I felt the pain of my life. I was tired of feeling pain. I was tired of abuse. I was tired of shame. I was tired of being called names. I was just tired. I wanted rest. Even if that meant death. These feelings didn't go away. Several months later I had a nervous breakdown. I started crying one day and simply couldn't stop. This led to a two week stay in a mental hospital. Yes, the highlight of my senior year in high school was two weeks in a mental ward.
While there I met many amazing kids. I heard their stories. I remember one girl had a dad who had been featured on Unsolved Mysteries because he left for work one morning and simply disappeared. I remember Nadia, who was schizophrenic. Yes, over 25 years later, I remember her name. I learned things while there that have helped me numerous times over the course of my adult life. But those things never gave me true hope.
I encountered true hope when I met Jesus. We seek so many things to give our lives meaning. We seek relationships, friendships, the latest phone, experiment with sex, alcohol, drugs, and so many other addictions. We even will have children thinking they will give our lives meaning. We place unrealistic expectations on others to make us happy and give us purpose. We seek and seek in vain. It is only through accepting Christ that we can find our true purpose and identity. It's because He lives that we can live too. You CAN face tomorrow when you have a relationship with Christ. All fear CAN be gone. When you know who holds tomorrow, you no longer have to worry about what you may face there.
If you are battling depression, don't stop fighting. If you need a friend to listen, I'm here. Don't hide in the shame of your thoughts. Satan would love nothing more than for you to take action and cancel the plan God has for your life. Because Jesus lives, you can face tomorrow. If you don't know Him, I would love to talk with you more about who He is and why He loves you so much.
